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[eggcel]

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[prettier]

Fuck.

[eggcel]

there was something else I was meant to tell you

oh me and dennis exchanged handjobs and recorded it for the older men in our lives

[prettier]

How was his cum face.

Wait, he's knocking off the elderly, too? Who's his older man? Are you actually related?

[eggcel]

I was too busy making my own cum face to watch his. I'll evaluate it next time

it's joe but don't say anything in case it's meant to be a secret

I'm pretty sure we ain't related. we just both like getting banged by blokes with plenty of experience and big dicks

1/2

[prettier]

Joe Macmillan?

He's not that old.

[prettier]

And that explains it, I suppose. Although not what you were doing with each other.

[eggcel]

you sayin you wouldn't try fucking yourself if your face twin showed up?

I can't be the only person who's done it here....

can I?

[prettier]

We had this conversation. It's weird as fuck. This face is copyright to me, I'm not hiring it out to some twat from another world for a handjob.

But it was a joke, Eggsy.

[eggcel]

I promise if your face twin comes along you'll still be my favourite

just like how I better be yours

[prettier]

I don't know, I haven't had you for a while.

Then again, I haven't had Dennis at all, so I suppose that makes you the default.

[eggcel]

maybe you should stop being a huge cocktease and put out for me then?

you could always have both of us

I'm trying to set up a threesome with joe first though but I can put your name on the waiting list

[prettier]

I don't do lists. Or most people twice.

Though I suppose I could see what you've picked up since the first time.

[eggcel]

I ain't most people

what do you really like doing? whatever you want I can give it to you

[prettier]

Really? Because you look like more than one of them.

Oh, Jesus, is that what you're into. See, I always thought you must have Harry coming at the crook of your finger. Is it the other way round?

[eggcel]

...smartarse

I've never actually done that with him

holy shit I've never fucked harry??

it's actually weird how he's never asked me to

what if he thinks I'd be shit at it???

[prettier]

It's not that weird. Most people pick a side and stick to it. They might say they switch but you get them home and find out they only want you if you're face down. Some people don't fuck, or don't get fucked. It's just what they like. And half the time if they're more than ten years older they think they should fuck you, for appearances sake. It's fucking stupid.

You haven't asked to fuck him, though?

Would you want to?

[eggcel]

I don't think he does it cuz he's older than me... that'd be fucking weird if he thought like that

I've never really thought about it before with him? it's just always led to me getting fucked and I know how good that feels so when I see it going that way I don't stop it but

would be nice to be the one balls deep in him for a change

how the fuck do I bring it up in conversation

"hey you know how much I like your dick in me but can I stick it in your arse for once"?

[prettier]

That sounds like how you'd bring it up, yeah.

Have you done it, though? Fucked someone? It's different than with girls.

1/2

[eggcel]

technically I've always taken it up the arse by every man I've been with

so I could be shit at shagging harry

[eggcel]

I've got a plan

I come to yours and fuck you until you think I'm good enough

[prettier]

So I'm supposed to put up with it if you're shit at shagging me?

[eggcel]

if I'm shit then that'll mean you're a shit teacher

c'mon freddie you know you're the best at teaching me about sex

and you did a good job at teaching me how to take it up the arse

bet it'll only take a couple of rounds before I'm a pro

I'll blow you/eat you out/take your dick in me between shags?

[prettier]

I'm not a pair of training wheels for your cock.

You can come over. Later - actually, you can meet me when the club lets out, we'll walk back. But it's not a lesson, or a transaction.

And we'll see.

[eggcel]

[ And we'll see, Freddie had texted Eggsy, which was fair enough. He saw Freddie as his gay guru but he didn't have to help Eggsy, especially the way he'd propositioned it to him. If they ended up just talking all night, Eggsy wouldn't mind, he still wanted to catch up with his friend. He had no idea where Freddie's head was at after that guy had shown up in the city looking exactly like someone dangerous from Freddie's past... Hopefully he hadn't gotten into more trouble since then.

So he meets Freddie at Cupid Stunt's, doesn't go in, just waits outside while people file out around closing time. He knows Freddie will be out soon enough so he waits by leaning against the front wall of the building in the meantime, dressed in his usual horrendous Jeremy Scott jacket and equally offensive shoes of the same brand. He looks a bit like a lurking chav but nothing can be done to rectify that. ]

[prettier]

[That's the problem with being a good first fuck. People just keep coming back.

Though, jokes aside, Freddie had guessed the first time that Eggsy approached him for sex that it wasn't all for curiosity's sake. When Harry came into the picture it was easy to figure out what he'd been testing the water for. (And now apparently it's love - bloody hell. Though love of a kind that doesn't rule out fucking around, obviously.)

For all the teasing, Freddie doesn't object like he might pretend he does. Eggsy's a friend. And a fucking athlete, so the chances of him actually being a bad time in bed are low. Even if he was, he'd be a nice view.

And there aren't any other particular prospects in Cupid's tonight. Freddie spends the last half hour or so keeping one eye out for Eggsy, surprised when he doesn't show up. Until he checks the security cameras. Eggsy looks like a lurking chav because he is a lurking chav. When Freddie emerges onto the street a few minutes later, catching his breath at the cold outside air biting through the sheen of sweat still clinging to his skin, he reaches to grab Eggsy's wrist.]

Fuck's sake. Get inside, no one's leaving because they're scared you're going to mug them.

[It's a lie. Inside it's quiet, and dark, and warm.]