[Look, man. His birthday has never been a 'big deal' so he didn't really tell anyone, it kinda slipped out with Joe and so they hung out that day and... well yeah.]
while back yeah
having balls dont mean shit when you aint got a brain he said no says everything can just be the same as it was before that
i just dont know if i can do that it feels os fucking weird now
i thought he was telling me that that he loved me he gave me the fucking moon eggsy
[Okay wait. Wait a second, he's sending a video now. His miserable face, he's obviously been having a cry, eyes red, but that's not what's important right now. It's the small moon orbiting around his head. About the size of a baseball, maybe a little bigger.
It's magical, Dennis doesn't know how or where Joe got it, but at the time it was so fantastic and made him feel... elated. Now he can't look at it without feeling his stomach twist up. Okay, video over!]
he literally said no to me when i asked if hed be my bf told me he cares about me
could barely say i loved him when we talk other times but he keep saying everything can be the same as before
[ Dennis looks like shit, but he probably knows that. It's hard to look away from his red eyes and not feel rage over who's caused Dennis to look so miserable, but eventually Eggsy looks to this magical gift of Joe's. It's pretty fucking cool - jaw-dropping in fact - not to mention romantic as fuck. What's Joe playing at? ]
nobody gets someone something like that and doesn't love them
[All his worries about admitting his feelings and asking Joe about making things more serious had been put aside when he got that present. Who wouldn't think what he had? Right?]
i dont know i really dont he keeps syaing he cares he tries to talk to me and stuff but i fuck things up
dont know why he aint just told me to fuck off
he said he was running late for something that hed call me later dont know what for
[It's... it's nice to see someone else say it. Joe keeps telling him he's not stupid or hasn't fucked anything up, there's nothing to fix, but when it's coming from the person who he's pretty sure he's ruined everything with well.
It just doesn't penetrate that skull of his, or the fog of emotion that's been clouding his mind for quite sometime now.]
i dunno didnt say i want to see him wanna talk more but then i really dont
what's done is done den. no point wasting your incentive like that
you should stay over
me and harry will be out for a bit but I'll leave the key under the doormat for you to let yourself in. shouldn't be too long. we can chill when I get back.
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text | april 1st
im a fucking idiot
idont know what to do
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i told joe i loved him back onmy birthday
asked him to be my bf and fucked everything up
its got so fucking stupid
1/3
[ wait, not important (except it is, bad dennis for not telling him) ]
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not only did you tell joe you wanted him to be your boyfriend
you also told him you're in love with him
on the same day
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[ bigger ones than eggsy ]
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while back yeah
having balls dont mean shit when you aint got a brain
he said no
says everything can just be the same as it was before that
i just dont know if i can do that it feels os fucking weird now
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maybe he really hates labels. musta got spooked by the L word
happened to me when harry first said it
I freaked the fuck out
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he gave me the fucking moon eggsy
[Okay wait. Wait a second, he's sending a video now. His miserable face, he's obviously been having a cry, eyes red, but that's not what's important right now. It's the small moon orbiting around his head. About the size of a baseball, maybe a little bigger.
It's magical, Dennis doesn't know how or where Joe got it, but at the time it was so fantastic and made him feel... elated. Now he can't look at it without feeling his stomach twist up. Okay, video over!]
he literally said no to me when i asked if hed be my bf
told me he cares about me
could barely say i loved him when we talk other times
but he keep saying everything can be the same as before
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nobody gets someone something like that and doesn't love them
unless he's been leading you on this whole time
do you know what his plans are tonight?
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i dont know i really dont
he keeps syaing he cares
he tries to talk to me and stuff but i fuck things up
dont know why he aint just told me to fuck off
he said he was running late for something that hed call me later
dont know what for
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you were honest and upfront
he shouldn't expect you to wait around until he has time in his busy fucking schedule to talk to you
what the fuck is more important than this?
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It just doesn't penetrate that skull of his, or the fog of emotion that's been clouding his mind for quite sometime now.]
i dunno
didnt say
i want to see him wanna talk more but then i really dont
does that make me fucked up?
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and if you still love him even though you feel like he's messed with your head
with your heart
that don't make you fucked up either
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sometimes wish i coudl just stop
would make everything easier
but i cant and i know i cant turn back time to fix that
[And he laughs bitterly to himself, shaking his head.]
maybe i could make it my new insentive
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you should stay over
me and harry will be out for a bit but I'll leave the key under the doormat for you to let yourself in. shouldn't be too long. we can chill when I get back.
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thanks bruv
think i will
see you soon yeah?
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[ says the guy diving face-first into it ]